zzzz damn sian. now end duty early also cannot go home. drag n drag until super late. damn fucking 百无聊赖.

that in english means SUPER BORED, and its very wu liao also, i feel. you are wasting human resources, wasting time and also wasting life. most importantly, no one is happy about it.

sometimes when people operate things from another perspective blindly, it doesnt occur to them that it is actually fucking stupid, which is what it is.

i hope they will realise it is all pointless, sooner or later. if not, we will all eat shit and die in the drain.

still. want. us. to donate. you listen ah, donate. to. the. damn. place.

donate is volunteery right? no, you are forced to donate. what the eff-you-see-kay.

nb chao pu bor sia.

i remember a few instances in my life when i donated like more den 30 or 40 dollars to some needy foundations and i felt happy about it because i helped someone. call the charity tv also got. kanina now you make me 1 cent also dont feel like giving.

our lives there are already quite miserable. its not like we got alot of incentives or what. if got maybe nvm.

im not rich also ok, you think what, i shit notes from my backside isit? LOL

i kiam siap? its actually not about the money ok, its about the way you treat ppl and do things. its like some modus operandi or something. i from want to donate also dont want liao. sickening.

anyway, chill!

and so... that when i was doing duty with the new bird at night, chatted alot and eventually we talked about the supernatural stuff and the human mind. somehow, somehow, we listed 3 things in todays' horror movies that drove chills up the spine of people. we did not include gore, because i feel that is a totally different thing.

1) long hair
2) long sharp and hard fingernails scratching against surfaces like metal doors and chalkboards and producing a horrible high pitched screeching noise
3) female zombies crawling in an unnatural manner with superhuman strength, this is a bit vague, but i will explain.

and so we were thinking why these 3 sights bring so much fear and uneasiness into most people, including myself...hmmm (update soon)

woke up today with weird thoughts, indulged in reminiscence for awhile. quickly cleared that out of my mind,
沉默往往是最后的温柔

late bookout thanks(no thanks) to new rules and regulations...whatever. fucked up.


maybe going out later... should be most probably.

because saw a damn nice shirt at esprit orchard awhile back, super tempted to buy.

temptations...now thats a whole new topic not for discussion now.


lunch is laksa, wow damn shiok. im not a fan of spicy food, but this is heavenly.


the tao gay, the cockles, the tau pok, the fishball , o m f g la

[updated]

so damn tired. its almost 2am and i have to wake up at 5.30am or so for tomorrow. deepavali still need to go back camp.. kanina yan der pu de na bu.

shortly after i consumed my laksa, my life as of today is roughly as follows minus all the details :

-went to meet jon at yiochukang, den proceed to meet eug at orchard

-shopping 1/2 way, KENA RECALL BACK TO CAMP... run all the way back to choa chu kang.

-after dai ji settle, go back woodlands meet jon, den go orchard again.

-bought all my stuffs, go back woodlands

-from woodlands go changi airport

-saw mr eug off to his taiwan trip

-reached home 1.30am, damn tired, i slept like a zombie inside the car

some interesting points to note.

friday signifies the coming of saturday and sunday, where we would all possibly take a break

..

everytime you realise its a friday, one week of your life has passed. unwittingly.

its like smlj? one week pass liao?

the sands of time never flow back. they only leave behind memories.

was the past one week happy? was it meaningful, at least to you? if you could, would you want to go back to last friday again?

how many people actually remember what happened in their life for the past one week?
..
some people vaguely do
..
thats because their current life is a repetitive cycle, like me.
..
human machines, with programmed emotions...
..

almost no difference from real machines.

woke up today with a bad tummy, went to camp, got sent home for forced leave. THANKS AH. ok nvm bopian lor, got no choice also. kcuf , hongkan.

i feel i am becoming fat. but no leh..i think its psychological nia. eat eat eat eat, maybe its time to really exercise again.

for the first time in such a long time to come, i played dota until i felt tired.

but it was fun and always will be, to play with friends. : )

-[ill be waiting at the other end of the rainbow, if you need me after the storm]-

P.S just remember to bring me some sweet honey, because i feel like a bee today. =p

i must say...

that my mental juice is on low flow today.

i am at a total loss for words...blank.

at least for now!

...spent the whole late afternoon and evening downloading some songs and playing Untold Legends on my psp. dinner order mac. lol 我受不了 Macdonald's 的诱惑 , too long never eat liao.. so order macspicy double upsize + more lettuce ....

the new wasabi shaker fries is not bad... i feel



Untold Legends grind until 3am, fucking tired. Pillow, here i come.

my first ever blog post. like what the hell. how should i start?







like this?

WEEEEE ITS MY FIRST POST EVER! PLEASE TAG ME IF YOU KNOW ME!





no..

that will look

absolutely stupid! and very childish on first look. it may have in-depth sarcasm. but it looks childish.

and very the shen jing bing as well.

amazing how simple words can have so many meanings on an analytical person like me.


But anyway, if you are my friend : ) please tag me.

i suddenly! got the urge to create because i have a desire to pen down, or in this case, type down, the thoughts of my life now. i hope they would become fond memories.

i would relish the good ones.
and laugh at the bad ones.
i hope.. : (

but i think it is going to be a lengthy first post..



here we go and i apologize for my vulgarities.

i swear, the *place* i am in now is getting fucked up nowadays. seriously to hell with all the damn rules and regulations, a group of people who work together for a better cause ultimately should rely on trust and friendship. NOT DICTACTED BY SOME FUCKING RULES which will only get nerfed* sooner or better.


*a term for downgraded


ok genius, then what is the point of putting them up in the first place? nabey. you dont want to help people, at least help yourself. but no, you just want everybody to die with you. fucking stupid.



i hate scolding vulgarities seriously, but this is just wtf buay tahan. to the fucking max. i cant work with authorities who has got massive toilet bowls for cranial capacities.

we are not stupid de leh. stop thinking that we are like you, or maybe worse. we are all fucking educated in a country with a fair living system.( at least we were made to believe it is )**oooh the irony.

damn fucking sian sia. still got one more year. i only enjoy the place because of friends. to hell with almost everything else. zzzz.


even the food is disgusting.

actually it isnt... THAT would be insulting the word disgusting.






to be honest i made this. this blog. a week ago.. but i was too busy to think and write .. and maybe also partially kinda lazy as well...


recently in my life again, it has been quite happening. in a very unfortunate way. it has been more than one week ago.


it is one of those moments where you spend a couple of days in total dementia(almost) and become sane and normal very fast again because ive learnt from past lessons. 很痛苦. all the negative feelings come to you like all the raindrops flowing to a small drain.

sad? sorry man. im afraid sadness is only the beginning.

it is always a game of flying kites.
big wind, kite fly very fast and high, but more chance to fly away.
small wind, kite sometimes dont fly, when kites sometimes dont fly, people take your kite and fly.
no wind, lagi worse. DEN YOU BUY KITE FOR WHAT!!


we live in a world of desires and expectations. we always expect the kite to fly back to you at the end of the day. but we knn never think the fucking string will break one cos you damn idiot never buy insurance for the kite.


fuck la, even if got insurance, they pay you for the kite, the kite maybe also spoil liao.


sometimes new kite too expensive. not in $ way.


i hate flying kites. they hurt me so badly. t.t



天有不测风云 sounds so appropriate now. in both meanings. haha. CRUEL PHRASE!




my friend said it is like toys. but i think he too crude liao. at least kite got more YIMOSHENS...

afterwards you grind your songlist to relieve yourself. play and play and play non stop until sometimes no feeling.





when it comes to doing things, i am either a passionate perfectionist, or just super duper lazy(because i dont care about the end results)

when it is the former, i expect everyone to be a-sort-of honourable and trustworthy because you yourself put so much effort and time into it. and when i fail, i can be very very very upset. hard to recover. confidence shattered, thought asundered, every word related to breaking and destroying comes to you.

uoy evol llits i. just maybe not that much anymore. i am a person, a human, with all emotions a normal human should have afterall.


and i hate to hear sad things. we are all human beings, and sometimes we are too complacent and indulgent to see how fragile life can be.
you weep.
you cry.
after that you forget again. return from hell to paradise and forget how life is like with hell and no paradise.
such is the ignorance.
such is the human mind.
such frailty.
such is us.



you cant wait for things to come, and when they come, you miss the moments before they came.
tamade.
some people are never satisfied. with anything.